Free Katie Now

From CNN.com:

Katie Holmes says she's converting to the Church of Scientology, embracing the religion of her boyfriend, Tom Cruise.

Western civilization has flourished for thousands of years, and it's been a good run, on the balance. Certainly there have been wars and oppression, but it has produced Degas, Mozart, Hendrix, Jefferson, Shakespeare, Pascal, and Miles Davis. Even some of the music from the 1980s has stood the test of time - as odd as that seems.

But now, by virtue of the fact that CNN sees the conversion of a vapid actress to a cultish quasi-religion as news - I think we can turn out the lights and wait for invaders to sweep in and begin chopping people into bits. Perhaps they will come from Montreal. Or the gods, sickened with rage at our brainless idiocy, will send down thunderbolts to raze our cities, starting (one would hope) with Atlanta, where CNN is headquartered.

Either way, we richly deserve it. There is a last-minute effort for salvation, but I'm afraid the end is nigh.