Fred Checks Out

One of the last great conservative hopes decided to bail out of the presidential race today after a handful of lackluster electoral performances. Of course, "conservative" these days is an elusive term hotly debated by the warring factions that used to be the GOP. Fred was simply the guy everybody argued about the least.

But he looked much better on paper than in the heat of the campaign trail, and he was dogged by the lingering impression that he'd rather be playing golf, or parked at the bar of a steakhouse in North Carolina near the airport - or pretty much anything besides running for president. That, plus disorganization, made him all but irrelevant.

And the real shame? Jeri won't be the First Lady.

So it's down to Mitt, Rudy, and John. The first two are viewed as treacherous east-coast types who are insufficiently intolerant on social issues, and the last one is widely seen by right wing bloggers and radio hosts as the Republican Alger Hiss. Huckabee gets some credit as a snake-wrangler, but he's about as small-government as Rob Reiner.

Anyway, happy trails Fred. Nobody doubts you're a decent man, and there may yet be a part for you on the American political stage.