Tuesday's Unrelated Questions

1. What if, instead of bitching about crime in the city, affluent people with a European heritage and fair skin tried muttering the lyrics to their favorite songs as they walked down the street? There's nothing that says "don't mess with me" like a retired CPA slouching along wearing headphones and rapping out Neil Diamond's "Cracklin' Rose" under his breath.
   
   
2. Do you understand the traumatic potential involved in being sent off to the 3rd grade with a 'Six Million Dollar Man' lunchbox in 1980 a full two years after the original series went off the air? Boys that age jump on every vulnerability.
   
   
3. Does Zig Ziglar ever have one of those days when he wakes up around 10:45AM, putters around the house for a few minutes, goes back to bed, gets up again around 1:20PM, rummages around in the kitchen for something to eat and finally sits down in front of Comedy Central with a bag of Doritos?